What Really is a Covert Narcissist? (Special Throwback Episode)

What Really is a Covert Narcissist? (Special Throwback Episode)

Many people are struggling to understand what a covert narcissist actually is. I recently heard a podcast that was trying to figure out what a covert narcissist really is. They clearly, like so many, did not understand. I was surprised when they said, "Aren’t all narcissists covert because they all do things in secret?" They were talking about secret affairs, abuse behind closed doors, secret communication, private financial endeavors, and so on. They were questioning if all narcissists were covert. I was happy to hear them recognize that they did not understand and were going to have to do further research.

Being a covert narcissist isn't about having secret affairs or a double life or anything like that. It isn't defined that way. A covert narcissist is a narcissist that hides the arrogance and the feelings of superiority behind a facade of humbleness. They hide their lack of empathy behind a false show of compassion. Some are so good at it that they truly convince themselves that they are a kind and compassionate person. Nothing you say will ever convince them to even consider that they are not.

Covert narcissists often hide behind a facade of shyness, insecurity, introvertedness, and social awkwardness. They hide behind a show of compassion and sacrifice. Covert narcissists really believe in this image that they are portraying. Victims often feel sorry for them and want to help them. This plays a huge role in how we get trapped in these relationships. Covert narcissists are experts at playing the victim role, and I mean experts.

I hope this episode helps you to gain a better understanding of what covert narcissism is. Regardless of what type of narcissism you are dealing with, abuse is abuse and abuse is wrong!

I am Renee Swanson, and I help people recover from covert narcissistic abuse.

  • Are you tired of feeling isolated and alone?
  • Are you searching for people who get it?
  • Are you confused, reactive and unsure what to do?
  • Are you running in circles in your mind?
  • Are you worried for your kids and the effect this is having on them?
  • Do you want to know how not to raise another narcissist in this world?

I can help you! I offer both group and individual coaching, which you can find at www.covertnarcissism.com

Renee Swanson, Certified Coach and Advocate for Victims of Covert Narcissistic Abuse

http://www.covertnarcissism.com

https://www.tiktok.com/@cngreneeswanson

https://www.youtube.com/@cngreneeswanson

https://www.facebook.com/renee.covertnarcissism


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Episoder(440)

The Narcissism Spectrum

The Narcissism Spectrum

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13 Des 202119min

Breaking the Internal Chains of Abuse

Breaking the Internal Chains of Abuse

Memories can absolutely haunt victims of covert narcissistic abuse for years!! They trigger us, causing massive internal reactions. Anxiety, tension, pain in the gut, shaking, twitching, upset stomach...

5 Des 202122min

The Narcissist’s Prayer Part 2

The Narcissist’s Prayer Part 2

This 2-part series on the Narcissist’s prayer serves a guide through the circular conversations and manipulative tactics of a covert narcissist. Each step expresses a ploy used by the covert narcissis...

2 Des 202118min

The Narcissist’s Prayer Part 1

The Narcissist’s Prayer Part 1

That didn't happen. And if it did, it wasn't that bad. And if it was, that's not a big deal. And if it is, that's not my fault. And if it was, I didn't mean it. And if I did, you deserved it. This sho...

29 Nov 202118min

Episode 5 - How do We Turn the Survival Skills Off

Episode 5 - How do We Turn the Survival Skills Off

So how do we build healthy relationships after being with a covert narcissist? How are these trauma responses affecting us still? How do we turn them off? Our trauma responses to an abusive environmen...

21 Nov 202123min

Episode 4 - The Survival Skills of a Covert Narcissist and Their Victim

Episode 4 - The Survival Skills of a Covert Narcissist and Their Victim

Have you ever wondered if you are the narcissist in this relationship? Maybe you have even been accused of it by your abusive partner? Have you seen glimpses within yourself of narcissistic reactions?...

18 Nov 202124min

Episode 3 - Tactical Responses to the Trauma of Abuse

Episode 3 - Tactical Responses to the Trauma of Abuse

Have you ever found yourself to be extremely defensive, feeling the need to protect yourself before anyone even attacks? How about having the burning need to be perfect so nothing ever goes wrong? Whe...

15 Nov 202124min

Episode 2 - Internal Trauma Responses to Covert Abuse

Episode 2 - Internal Trauma Responses to Covert Abuse

Has your partner ever accused you of pulling away from the relationship? Of shutting down? Of being emotionally unavailable? Maybe you even feel that you are. Then you wonder if this is all your fault...

10 Nov 202123min

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