What Really is a Covert Narcissist? (Special Throwback Episode)

What Really is a Covert Narcissist? (Special Throwback Episode)

Many people are struggling to understand what a covert narcissist actually is. I recently heard a podcast that was trying to figure out what a covert narcissist really is. They clearly, like so many, did not understand. I was surprised when they said, "Aren’t all narcissists covert because they all do things in secret?" They were talking about secret affairs, abuse behind closed doors, secret communication, private financial endeavors, and so on. They were questioning if all narcissists were covert. I was happy to hear them recognize that they did not understand and were going to have to do further research.

Being a covert narcissist isn't about having secret affairs or a double life or anything like that. It isn't defined that way. A covert narcissist is a narcissist that hides the arrogance and the feelings of superiority behind a facade of humbleness. They hide their lack of empathy behind a false show of compassion. Some are so good at it that they truly convince themselves that they are a kind and compassionate person. Nothing you say will ever convince them to even consider that they are not.

Covert narcissists often hide behind a facade of shyness, insecurity, introvertedness, and social awkwardness. They hide behind a show of compassion and sacrifice. Covert narcissists really believe in this image that they are portraying. Victims often feel sorry for them and want to help them. This plays a huge role in how we get trapped in these relationships. Covert narcissists are experts at playing the victim role, and I mean experts.

I hope this episode helps you to gain a better understanding of what covert narcissism is. Regardless of what type of narcissism you are dealing with, abuse is abuse and abuse is wrong!

I am Renee Swanson, and I help people recover from covert narcissistic abuse.

  • Are you tired of feeling isolated and alone?
  • Are you searching for people who get it?
  • Are you confused, reactive and unsure what to do?
  • Are you running in circles in your mind?
  • Are you worried for your kids and the effect this is having on them?
  • Do you want to know how not to raise another narcissist in this world?

I can help you! I offer both group and individual coaching, which you can find at www.covertnarcissism.com

Renee Swanson, Certified Coach and Advocate for Victims of Covert Narcissistic Abuse

http://www.covertnarcissism.com

https://www.tiktok.com/@cngreneeswanson

https://www.youtube.com/@cngreneeswanson

https://www.facebook.com/renee.covertnarcissism


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Episoder(434)

I Lost Myself to a Covert Narcissist

I Lost Myself to a Covert Narcissist

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27 Sep 202117min

How Does This Get Better?

How Does This Get Better?

How do I fix this? I used to ask that for years. Every day of my life I can fix anything. If I can just help him to see… If I can just find the right words… How does this get better? I get asked this ...

20 Sep 202120min

Covert Narcissists See Their World Through a Filter of Anger

Covert Narcissists See Their World Through a Filter of Anger

Covert narcissists seem to have absolutely no emotional intelligence, inside themselves or with the world around them. The general consensus is that they have no understanding of basic human emotion, ...

15 Sep 202121min

Two Things You Should Never Say to a Victim of Covert Narcissism

Two Things You Should Never Say to a Victim of Covert Narcissism

There are some things that people should just never say to a victim of narcissistic abuse, and specifically covert narcissistic abuse. As a victim myself, I know that It is so hard sometimes to find p...

5 Sep 202123min

Guilt Manipulation: How a Covert Narcissist Uses Your Own Guilt Against You

Guilt Manipulation: How a Covert Narcissist Uses Your Own Guilt Against You

Guilt is such a unique thing. It can be wonderful and horrible all at the same time. Many of us are raised to feel guilty when we do something that we should not or when we hurt someone’s feelings. We...

28 Aug 202117min

What Really is a Covert Narcissist

What Really is a Covert Narcissist

Many people are struggling to understand what a covert narcissist actually is. I recently heard a podcast that was trying to figure out what a covert narcissist really is. They clearly, like so many, ...

23 Aug 202117min

Brinkmanship: The Crazy-Making Skills of a Covert Narcissist

Brinkmanship: The Crazy-Making Skills of a Covert Narcissist

My covert narcissistic husband loved the word "brinkmanship." He bragged about how no one knows what that word means and how great he is at it. This should have set alarm bells off in my head!! But it...

13 Aug 202115min

A Grenade Inside a Tank

A Grenade Inside a Tank

Someone who has experienced covert narcissistic abuse is like a grenade inside a tank. On the inside, you are wound up so incredibly tight, over-thinking everything, over-analyzing everything. Just wa...

31 Jul 202115min

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