Episode 4 - The Survival Skills of a Covert Narcissist and their Victim

Episode 4 - The Survival Skills of a Covert Narcissist and their Victim

Have you ever wondered if you are the narcissist in this relationship? Maybe you have even been accused of it by your abusive partner? Have you seen glimpses within yourself of narcissistic reactions?
There are very distinct reasons that you see signs of narcissism in you or your children, and they have to do with the survival skills we have been discussing in this series. No, this does not make you a narcissist! I want to explain to you why you see this, what really is happening, and what to do about it.
Narcissism is a learned set of survival skills that becomes one’s entire personality and their way of interacting with their world. Let me explain what I mean. This covert narcissist in your life has put you into an environment where you, over time, begin living from your own survival skills. The trauma responses we have been talking about in this series. I will say again - these are normal and healthy responses to an abusive environment.
One large problem is that they look an awful lot like the survival skills that narcissists live by. They are just glimpses of it, not your entire being, but these glimpses can leave many victims confused and worried.

I am Renee Swanson, and I help people recover from covert narcissistic abuse.

  • Are you tired of feeling isolated and alone?
  • Are you searching for people who get it?
  • Are you confused, reactive and unsure what to do?
  • Are you running in circles in your mind?
  • Are you worried for your kids and the effect this is having on them?
  • Do you want to know how not to raise another narcissist in this world?
I can help you! I offer both group and individual coaching, which you can find at www.covertnarcissism.com

Renee Swanson, Certified Coach and Advocate for Victims of Covert Narcissistic Abuse

http://www.covertnarcissism.com

https://www.tiktok.com/@cngreneeswanson

https://www.youtube.com/@cngreneeswanson

https://www.facebook.com/renee.covertnarcissism


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Episoder(436)

5 Questions to Ask Yourself When Covert Narcissism Might Be in the Room

5 Questions to Ask Yourself When Covert Narcissism Might Be in the Room

Last week’s episode explored why covert narcissism appears to be thriving in today’s culture and the conditions that allow these behaviors to remain hidden. In this follow-up episode, we bring the con...

15 Mar 22min

The Invisible Rulebook: The Strange Rules Covert Narcissists Expect You to Follow

The Invisible Rulebook: The Strange Rules Covert Narcissists Expect You to Follow

In relationships with a covert narcissist, control doesn’t always appear as obvious demands. Instead, it often shows up through a confusing set of small, unwritten "rules" that quietly shape everyday ...

12 Mar 27min

Why Covert Narcissism Is Thriving in Today’s Culture: 5 Conditions That Allow It to Hide

Why Covert Narcissism Is Thriving in Today’s Culture: 5 Conditions That Allow It to Hide

Is narcissism actually increasing, or are we simply becoming more aware of it? The truth is that narcissistic traits have always existed throughout history. What changes over time is the environment t...

8 Mar 29min

Recognizing Covert Narcissism: From Self-Blame to Clarity (Part 2)

Recognizing Covert Narcissism: From Self-Blame to Clarity (Part 2)

In Part 2 of this community chat, we move from confusion to clarity. After years—sometimes decades—of minimizing behavior and blaming themselves, these women share what finally shifted. What happens w...

5 Mar 38min

Covert Narcissism and Children: Signs the Kids Are Hurting

Covert Narcissism and Children: Signs the Kids Are Hurting

If you are living with covert narcissism in your marriage and starting to notice changes in your children — depression, anxiety, slipping grades, withdrawal, golden child or scapegoat dynamics — this ...

1 Mar 24min

Covert Narcissism Community Chat: Why Was It So Hard to Call This Abuse? Part One

Covert Narcissism Community Chat: Why Was It So Hard to Call This Abuse? Part One

Why is it so difficult to recognize covert narcissistic abuse when you’re living inside it? In Part 1 of this community chat, Olivia, Cindy, and Shannon share why they couldn’t call their relationship...

26 Feb 31min

Covert Narcissism and the Nervous System: Why You Feel So Reactive

Covert Narcissism and the Nervous System: Why You Feel So Reactive

If you feel “too emotional,” hypersensitive, or unstable in your relationship, this episode will help you understand what is really happening. Today we are exploring covert narcissism and the nervous ...

22 Feb 22min

Covert Narcissism Q&A: Clarity, Boundaries & Radical Acceptance (Part 2)

Covert Narcissism Q&A: Clarity, Boundaries & Radical Acceptance (Part 2)

In Part 2 of this Q&A pulled directly from the Covert Narcissism Group Facebook page, we continue answering the real, unfiltered questions so many of you are quietly carrying. Why does couples therapy...

19 Feb 33min

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