#27: 5 Reasons You Might Be Attracted to Unavailable People
On Attachment28 Sep 2022

#27: 5 Reasons You Might Be Attracted to Unavailable People

In this week's episode, we're talking 5 reasons why you might be attracted to unavailable people. I'm constantly being asked the question of "Why do I attract unavailable people?" - but my response is always to ask instead "Why are you attracted to unavailable people?". We'll talk about negative core beliefs, family of origin dynamics, difficulty receiving support, saviour complexes, and more.

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Episoder(256)

#240: The #1 Thing to Focus On to Heal Anxious Attachment (Ask Steph)

#240: The #1 Thing to Focus On to Heal Anxious Attachment (Ask Steph)

In today’s Ask Steph episode, I’m answering the listener question: If you were only going to focus on one thing to start healing anxious attachment, what would it be?While there are many layers to thi...

12 Mar 6min

#239: The Anxious Attachment Healing Roadmap

#239: The Anxious Attachment Healing Roadmap

If you've been putting in the work to heal your anxious attachment but still feel like you're treading water, this episode is for you. In today's episode, I'm sharing what I believe are the three core...

10 Mar 25min

#238: Can a Relationship Survive If Only One Person is Doing the Work? (Ask Steph)

#238: Can a Relationship Survive If Only One Person is Doing the Work? (Ask Steph)

In this Ask Steph episode, I respond to a listener question I hear often: If I work on my anxious attachment, but my partner doesn’t work on their avoidant patterns, can the relationship still work?I ...

5 Mar 8min

#237: How Anxious & Avoidant People Differ Around Breakups

#237: How Anxious & Avoidant People Differ Around Breakups

In this episode, we explore one of the most painful dynamics after a breakup: watching your ex seem “fine” while you feel completely unravelled — and the stories that comparison creates. We unpack why...

3 Mar 18min

#236: Coping With Separation Anxiety When Your Partner Is Away (Ask Steph)

#236: Coping With Separation Anxiety When Your Partner Is Away (Ask Steph)

In this Ask Steph episode, I respond to a listener who says they generally feel secure in their relationship — except when their partner travels and is physically away. During those periods, they expe...

26 Feb 8min

#235: What Attachment Theory Does (& Does Not) Explain

#235: What Attachment Theory Does (& Does Not) Explain

Attachment theory has become a widely used framework for understanding relationship patterns — but it’s often misunderstood, overextended, or treated as a complete explanation for human behaviour.In t...

24 Feb 15min

#234: What Makes an Avoidant Partner Feel Safe to Open Up? (Ask Steph)

#234: What Makes an Avoidant Partner Feel Safe to Open Up? (Ask Steph)

In this Ask Steph episode, we explore one of the most common (and understandable) questions in anxious–avoidant dynamics: what actually helps an avoidant partner feel safe enough to open up emotionall...

19 Feb 6min

#233: How to Put an End to Situationships (Once & For All)

#233: How to Put an End to Situationships (Once & For All)

Situationships can feel exciting and full of potential, but over time they often become a source of anxiety, confusion, and self-doubt. In this episode, I explore why situationships are so hard to wal...

17 Feb 14min

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