45.  Dating Shameless + How to Transcend Shame with Jessica Stahl

45. Dating Shameless + How to Transcend Shame with Jessica Stahl

On the show today, we are joined by Jessica Stahl, creator of the indelible @vanillcooldance, to have an empowering conversation with us all about shame.

Indeed, shame is an incredibly strong emotion that can hold us back from fully embracing our authentic selves. Shame can keep us repeating the same patterns of beliefs and behaviors, and affect how we show up for ourselves. Shame can certainly impact our dating lives and how we form connections, too!

But what if we could date shamelessly?

Well, that's exactly what we're gonna do today!

In this episode, we explore the origins of shame, how it manifests in our dating experiences, and most importantly, how to overcome it. We'll discuss practical strategies for recognizing and addressing shame, and offer insights into building confidence and self-acceptance so you date - and connect - more authentically and fearlessly.

So, whether you're struggling with self-doubt, past relationship wounds, or societal pressures, this episode is for you.

Now let's meet Jessica and date shamelessly!

Then don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!

Enjoying the show and want to support my work? Buy the Flirt Coach a coffee!

About our guest: Vanillacooldance is a taboo-breaking cartoon and global community of over 72,000, founded by Jessica Stahl. Named the 2024 Sex & Relationships bCreator of the Year, Vanillacooldance sparks fearless conversations about sex, relationships, and living life unapologetically. Through bold cartoons and her newsletter SHAMELESS, Jessica tackles the topics we’re all secretly craving to discuss but too scared to say out loud, creating a space for people to reclaim their shameless selves. From viral street art to empowering workshops and brand collaborations, Vanillacooldance has evolved into a movement challenging societal norms. Jessica’s groundbreaking work was recognized by Cannes Lions, who named her one of 19 global female creative leaders in their 2024 See It Be It program, selected from over 1,400 applicants.

You can connect with Jessica on Substack, vanillacooldance.substack.com, and Instagram, instagram.com/vanillacooldance.

About your host: Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!

As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic, romantic, and with the self - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and deeper connections.

You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.

💗 Happy flirting!

Episoder(172)

142.  Dating Deliciously with Torah Cents (fall flashback!)

142. Dating Deliciously with Torah Cents (fall flashback!)

Are you ready to date deliciously?! On this episode, we welcome Torah Cents, who is going to give us all the details on how to infuse more fun, passion, pleasure, and desire into your dating life for ...

10 Okt 202555min

Flirtini #21:  7 Ways to Date Yourself!

Flirtini #21: 7 Ways to Date Yourself!

It’s a BRAND NEW Flirtini! This one is all about how to date (aka choose) yourself! Why this matters, what this looks like, and how to do it! Inside the episode, 7️⃣ ways to date yourself!   💗 Happy ...

9 Okt 202521min

141.  Romanticize Your Life:  Self Love and Confidence with Claira Hermet

141. Romanticize Your Life: Self Love and Confidence with Claira Hermet

Coming up on this episode of Flirtations, we’re joined by Claira Hermet to have a conversation with us about self-love, confidence, and how we can turn ordinary moments into something extraordinary. C...

6 Okt 202554min

140.  Strutting into Main Character Energy and Decentering Men with Star Monroe (fall flashback!)

140. Strutting into Main Character Energy and Decentering Men with Star Monroe (fall flashback!)

On the show today is none other than Star Monroe! We've got an incredible conversation about how to embrace - strut! - into main character energy (and what the truly means), as well as how to decenter...

3 Okt 20251h

Flirtini #20:  Getting Over a Situationship

Flirtini #20: Getting Over a Situationship

It’s a BRAND NEW Flirtini! This one is all about how to get over a situationship! Here’s what you can expect: ➡️ What is a situationship? (and what else we can call it!) ➡️ Why does it often hurt when...

1 Okt 202520min

139.  Rewiring the "What Ifs":  Anxiety, Overthinking, and Perfectionism in Dating with Dr. Jennifer Wolkin

139. Rewiring the "What Ifs": Anxiety, Overthinking, and Perfectionism in Dating with Dr. Jennifer Wolkin

Coming up on this episode of Flirtations, we’re talking anxiety, overthinking, and perfectionism in dating! You know that feeling when you replay every text, second-guess what you said on a date, or ...

29 Sep 20251h

138.  Fawning:  The Hidden Trauma Response with Dr. Ingrid Clayton

138. Fawning: The Hidden Trauma Response with Dr. Ingrid Clayton

Coming up on this episode of Flirtations, we welcome Dr. Ingrid Clayton to the show! Dr. Clayton is a clinical psychologist, speaker, and author of the brand-new book Fawning: Why the Need to Please M...

26 Sep 202551min

Flirtini #19:  How to Get a Date!

Flirtini #19: How to Get a Date!

It's a BRAND NEW Flirtini! In the last one we talked about multi-dating and in this one, it's how to get a date! Here's what you can expect: ➡️  Where to meet people:  online vs. in person ➡️  The dat...

25 Sep 202520min

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