45.  Dating Shameless + How to Transcend Shame with Jessica Stahl

45. Dating Shameless + How to Transcend Shame with Jessica Stahl

On the show today, we are joined by Jessica Stahl, creator of the indelible @vanillcooldance, to have an empowering conversation with us all about shame.

Indeed, shame is an incredibly strong emotion that can hold us back from fully embracing our authentic selves. Shame can keep us repeating the same patterns of beliefs and behaviors, and affect how we show up for ourselves. Shame can certainly impact our dating lives and how we form connections, too!

But what if we could date shamelessly?

Well, that's exactly what we're gonna do today!

In this episode, we explore the origins of shame, how it manifests in our dating experiences, and most importantly, how to overcome it. We'll discuss practical strategies for recognizing and addressing shame, and offer insights into building confidence and self-acceptance so you date - and connect - more authentically and fearlessly.

So, whether you're struggling with self-doubt, past relationship wounds, or societal pressures, this episode is for you.

Now let's meet Jessica and date shamelessly!

Then don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!

Enjoying the show and want to support my work? Buy the Flirt Coach a coffee!

About our guest: Vanillacooldance is a taboo-breaking cartoon and global community of over 72,000, founded by Jessica Stahl. Named the 2024 Sex & Relationships bCreator of the Year, Vanillacooldance sparks fearless conversations about sex, relationships, and living life unapologetically. Through bold cartoons and her newsletter SHAMELESS, Jessica tackles the topics we’re all secretly craving to discuss but too scared to say out loud, creating a space for people to reclaim their shameless selves. From viral street art to empowering workshops and brand collaborations, Vanillacooldance has evolved into a movement challenging societal norms. Jessica’s groundbreaking work was recognized by Cannes Lions, who named her one of 19 global female creative leaders in their 2024 See It Be It program, selected from over 1,400 applicants.

You can connect with Jessica on Substack, vanillacooldance.substack.com, and Instagram, instagram.com/vanillacooldance.

About your host: Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!

As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic, romantic, and with the self - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and deeper connections.

You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.

💗 Happy flirting!

Episoder(172)

137.  A Sexpert's Guide to Trust, Expectations, and Accountability in Dating with Dr. Juliana Hauser

137. A Sexpert's Guide to Trust, Expectations, and Accountability in Dating with Dr. Juliana Hauser

Coming up on this episode of Flirtations, we’re looking at the intersection of sexuality, trust, expectations, and accountability in dating! Joining us is Dr. Juliana Hauser, a licensed couples and fa...

22 Sep 20251h

136.  Autumnal Equinox Dating Horoscope with Fernie!

136. Autumnal Equinox Dating Horoscope with Fernie!

Coming up on this episode of Flirtations, Fernie is back on the show as we celebrate the change of seasons with something a little magical — it’s the autumnal equinox dating horoscope! Fernie, an astr...

19 Sep 202551min

Flirtini #18:  Is Multi-Dating Right for You?

Flirtini #18: Is Multi-Dating Right for You?

It’s a BRAND NEW Flirtini! This one is all multi-dating! Here’s what you can expect:   ➡️ What is multi-dating and how to do it. ➡️ How multi-dating is different from roster dating. ➡️ The two multi-d...

18 Sep 202521min

135.  How to Detach in Dating with Sabrina Bendory

135. How to Detach in Dating with Sabrina Bendory

Flirties, today we’re diving into a concept that can truly transform the way you date: detachment. Not the kind where you shut down or stop caring, but the kind where you finally stop tying your wort...

15 Sep 202553min

134.  Polyamory and Non-Monogamy in Dating with Leanne Yau

134. Polyamory and Non-Monogamy in Dating with Leanne Yau

Coming up on this episode of Flirtations, we’re diving into the world of polyamory with Leanne Yau!  Leanne is an award-winning polyamory educator and through her platform PolyPhilia, she creates educ...

12 Sep 202555min

Flirtini #17:  Expressing Interest in Dating

Flirtini #17: Expressing Interest in Dating

It’s a BRAND NEW Flirtini! This one all about expressing interest in dating and here’s what you can expect:   ➡️ How to express interest in dating and why this matters! ➡️ What does expressing interes...

10 Sep 202518min

133.  The Lovebombing Episode! with Kelsey Wonderlin

133. The Lovebombing Episode! with Kelsey Wonderlin

Coming up on this episode of Flirtations, we’re getting into one of the most confusing— and yet sometimes intoxicating—dating experiences out there: it’s lovebombing.  You know that rush when someone ...

8 Sep 202552min

132.  Small Talk Secrets:  How to Spark Real Connection with Dr. Connie Wang

132. Small Talk Secrets: How to Spark Real Connection with Dr. Connie Wang

Coming up on this episode of Flirtations, we’re diving into a topic that makes so many of us squirm—small talk.  Maybe you dread it, maybe you wonder what the point even is, or maybe you just want to ...

5 Sep 202551min

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