Self-Led in Bed, an IFS and Sexuality Podcast13 Nov 2025

20: IFS for Gay & Queer Men and Allies, with Max Littman

“Parts have different preferences… just because somebody exclusively is in the role of top doesn't mean all their parts want to do that. And same thing when it comes to bottoming or versatile. ” - Max Littman

Disclaimer: Please be aware that this episode includes explicit sexual discussion.Listener discretion is advised.

On today’s episode, Patricia speaks with Max Littman about his new book Internal Family Systems Therapy for Gay and Queer Men: A Companion for After Coming Out,. It is the first IFS book to center the inner lives and the larger systems that particularly impact gay and queer men. The book is very engaging and wide ranging, as was this episode’s conversation which wove together IFS, attunement, inner and outer dynamics related to living as a gay or queer man, preferred sexual positions and their intersection with the larger culture, social media influence and aspects of drag for artists and audiences. Max and I also discovered a shared love of language, especially puns, which he recognizes as a clue that he has a good amount of Self Energy on board.

Max Littman, LCSW, is an IFS therapist, consultant, and author based in the San Francisco Bay Area. His work centers on attunement, attachment, cultural burdens, and relational and neurobiological understandings of trauma. He specializes in working with gay and queer men and provides mentorship to therapists in private practice.

Connect with Max:

https://maxlittman.com/

Book - https://a.co/d/2VtoeVX

Follow Patricia on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/patriciarichconsulting/

Join the Self-Led Sexuality Free Facebook Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/selfleds3xualitywithpatriciarich

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34: Voices in my Bed: Trauma, Psychosis and IFS, with Stephanie Mitchell

Disclaimer: This episode contains discussions of psychosis, non-ordinary states, sexual trauma, transference, and adult sexuality. Listener discretion is advised."I think full healing comes to a place...

28 Juli 1h 14min

33: Somatic IFS for Sexual Healing and Pleasure, with LaDonna Silva

“Can I bring breath to that excitement and bring myself back into the body, holding some of that excited energy and actually letting my system slow down so I can cherish that moment?” LaDonna SilvaDis...

10 Juli 1h 16min

32: Healing from Purity Culture through IFS, with Forest Benedict

“Using IFS to heal my fear of hell…that was profound" - Forest BenedictDisclaimer: This episode contains explicit discussions of religious trauma, purity culture, sexual shame, and adult sexuality. Li...

25 Juni 54min

31: BDSM Through an IFS Lens, with Leonore Tjia

“I can be any part in this, any role in this. I'm both the writer, the producer, the director of this erotic theatrical experience my psyche is creating." Leonore TjiaDisclaimer: This episode contains...

28 Maj 1h 23min

30: Sexorcism: IFS and Unattached Burdens with Robert Falconer

"These things look like great, big, horrifying monsters, but actually they're really terrified small beings. Think about it for a minute. They're making their existence as a parasite, an unwanted inh...

14 Maj 1h 20min

29: Exposing My Parts, with Host Patricia Rich

In this special solo episode, host Patricia Rich celebrates her birthday, which coincides with Earth Day, by choosing to expose her parts…sharing more about her own internal system and inviting listen...

30 Apr 35min

28: Demonstration of IFS for Sexuality and Gender Healing, with Chelsea Odhner

Disclaimer: This episode includes explicit personal conversations about sexuality, gender identity, and religious trauma. Listener discretion is advised.In this episode Patty talks with Chelsea Rose O...

6 Apr 1h 3min

27: The Penis Speaks: Decoding Male Sexual Dysfunction, with Dan Watter

“...our unconscious will speak to us through our penis and self-protectively disrupt a sexual interaction due to some perceived danger or threat.” - Daniel Watter in The Existential Importance of th...

12 Mars 1h 21min