Who's the Favourite? Birth Order, Sibling Rivalry and Why It Matters

If you’ve ever worried about sibling rivalry, felt guilty about how your attention is divided, or wondered whether your children secretly believe you have a favourite, this episode will change how you see your family forever.

I’m joined by journalist and author Catherine Carr to talk about her extraordinary book Who’s the Favourite? - a deep dive into the hidden emotional world of siblings.

We explore the roles children fall into - the helper, the golden child, the invisible one - and how parents often reinforce these roles without realising.

We talk about birth‑order myths, why each child grows up in a completely different family, and how sibling dynamics can quietly shape anxiety, perfectionism and self‑worth.

And Catherine shares powerful insights on “glass siblings,” the children who become unseen because a brother or sister’s needs dominate family life.

If you’re raising siblings, an only child, or simply trying to understand the emotional ecosystem your children are growing up in, this conversation is essential. It’s warm, honest, eye‑opening, and it will give you the language and perspective you need to support every child in your family more intentionally.

More from Catherine:

Buy the book - https://a.co/d/0aiXNRSq

Listen to the podcast - https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/relatively/id1544111718

Highlights from this episode:

03:31 - Who’s the favourite?

09:13 - The optimal age gap

16:44 - Assigning roles

21:39 - Glass siblings

27:46 - I’m the star!

37:55 - Ch ch ch changes

41:17 - The longest relationship you will ever have

💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together

💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/

💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library

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DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

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