It Would Have Just Been Easier If..

It Would Have Just Been Easier If..

It would have been so much easier if he just would have hit me, just once. But he didn’t.

It would have been easier if he had just been a jerk to me all the time. But he wasn’t. It would be easier to see the abuse. It would be easier to talk about it and identify it. It would be easier to explain it to others. It would be easier to leave. It would be easier to not be in the relationship in the first place. It would just be easier if they were an asshole all the time. But they aren't. There certainly were days where I thought to myself, this would all be easier if he were just mean all the time. But he truly wasn’t and still isn’t. He has good traits too. He is charming at times. He is helpful. He is funny and even pleasant to be around.This is certainly a large part of the problem with covert narcissists. Those good traits can leave a victim in a huge quandary for years or even decades. Even four and a half years out of my marriage, this quandary showed up yet again.

I am Renee Swanson, and I help people recover from covert narcissistic abuse.

  • Are you tired of feeling isolated and alone?
  • Are you searching for people who get it?
  • Are you confused, reactive and unsure what to do?
  • Are you running in circles in your mind?
  • Are you worried for your kids and the effect this is having on them?
  • Do you want to know how not to raise another narcissist in this world?

I can help you! I offer both group and individual coaching, which you can find at www.covertnarcissism.com


Renee Swanson, Certified Coach and Advocate for Victims of Covert Narcissistic Abuse

http://www.covertnarcissism.com

https://www.tiktok.com/@cngreneeswanson

https://www.youtube.com/@cngreneeswanson

https://www.facebook.com/renee.covertnarcissism


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Episoder(437)

Thanksgiving Special: Healing from Covert Narcissistic Abuse Through Self-Gratitude

Thanksgiving Special: Healing from Covert Narcissistic Abuse Through Self-Gratitude

This Thanksgiving episode is unlike any you’ve heard before.Instead of forcing gratitude outward—toward family, toward traditions, toward circumstances that may feel complicated or painful—this episod...

27 Nov 202516min

How Unsafe People Erase Your Reality And Safe People Restore It

How Unsafe People Erase Your Reality And Safe People Restore It

In Part 2 of this story, we pick up right where the alligator encounter left off — not with danger, but with the emotional aftershock that followed. My body was still shaking, adrenaline pumping, brea...

23 Nov 202519min

When Every Conversation Turns into Confusion: The Communication Breakdown of Covert Narcissism

When Every Conversation Turns into Confusion: The Communication Breakdown of Covert Narcissism

In a healthy relationship, conversations might be difficult at times—but they are possible. You can talk, clarify, repair, and understand each other. But when you’re living with a covert narcissist, c...

20 Nov 202519min

I Kayaked Over an Alligator And Finally Understood My Trauma Response

I Kayaked Over an Alligator And Finally Understood My Trauma Response

In this episode, I’m taking you with me on a peaceful Florida river… right up to the moment my kayak bumped over what I thought was a floating log. Except it wasn’t a log. It was a massive mama alliga...

16 Nov 202522min

Not All Covert Narcissists Look the Same

Not All Covert Narcissists Look the Same

Covert narcissism isn’t one-size-fits-all. Some manipulate through silence, others through guilt or tears. Some quote scripture, some play the victim, and some simply vanish into the quiet coldness th...

13 Nov 202514min

The Inflatable Clown: Living with a Covert Narcissist Who Always Needs Air

The Inflatable Clown: Living with a Covert Narcissist Who Always Needs Air

Ever feel like you’ve been living in a circus you didn’t sign up for?In this episode, Renee Swanson uses humor to shine a light on the exhausting emotional reality of living with a covert narcissist —...

9 Nov 202521min

Parental Alienation Explained: How Covert Narcissists Turn Children Against You

Parental Alienation Explained: How Covert Narcissists Turn Children Against You

What if your greatest fear as a parent has already come true?You can feel it — your child pulling away, repeating phrases that don’t sound like them, looking at you through someone else’s eyes. This i...

6 Nov 202520min

The Hidden Weight of Resentment in Covert Narcissistic Abuse

The Hidden Weight of Resentment in Covert Narcissistic Abuse

Resentment is one of the hardest emotions to face after covert narcissistic abuse—because it shows up long before you even realize what’s happening. You start resenting them for the confusion, then re...

2 Nov 202515min

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