Author Wendy Behary on Narcissism and High Performance

Author Wendy Behary on Narcissism and High Performance

Wendy Behary is a founding fellow and consulting supervisor for The Academy of Cognitive Therapy (Aaron T. Beck Institute). Wendy has a specialty in treating narcissists and the people who live with and deal with them. She is the author of "Disarming the Narcissist -- surviving and thriving with the self-absorbed” translated in 10 languages. Narcissism and world-class achievement have an interesting relationship. When we think of those who excel on the world stage, it'd be easy to conjure up a story that they have a deep inner belief that they can be the absolute best in the world (that's actually not the case, as we've come to learn from many of the folks on the Finding Mastery Podcast. But for those who do hold that belief -- THE WORLD REVOLVES AROUND ME BECAUSE I’M THAT IMPORTANT AND SPECIAL --is when my antenna tends to attune to the concept of narcissism. It's the excessive self-centered vanity and lack of regard for others that is one of the hallmarks of narcissism. We can all be self-absorbed, needy….. display narcissistic behavior from time to time…that's not what this is about….it's when the sense of grandiosity is so pervasive that it impairs daily functioning with others, and in essence, within themselves. Narcissism is named for the Greek myth of Narcissus—who was a hunter and when he saw his own reflection in the water, he fell in love with it, not realizing it was merely an image. He stared at his reflection until he died. The way I like to simplify narcissism, is that the person can't tell the difference between himself and everyone around him -- everyone then becomes a reflection of his him -- in which gives him the right to use them as extensions of his own self-worth (even if that means public embarrassment). There was an interesting piece of research in the Journal of applied sport psychology, 2013, by Ross Roberts and team -- where they found that the more narcissistic a person was, the less they benefited from psychological skills training - in other words, all you had to do for them, is turn on the lights, and they came alive. If you have ever thought, am I'm living with or working with a narcissist, or am I a narcissist? Wendy provides ways to tease that out. She dives into why so many elite performs are narcissists, and how we can be more effective with living and working with them.

_________________

Subscribe to our Youtube Channel for more powerful conversations at the intersection of high performance, leadership, and meaning: https://www.youtube.com/c/FindingMastery

Get exclusive discounts and support our amazing sponsors! Go to: https://findingmastery.com/sponsors/

Subscribe to the Finding Mastery newsletter for weekly high performance insights: https://www.findingmastery.com/newsletter

Download Dr. Mike's Morning Mindset Routine! https://www.findingmastery.com/morningmindset

Follow us on Instagram, LinkedIn, and X.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episoder(610)

How To Stay Calm Under Stress | Dan Harris

How To Stay Calm Under Stress | Dan Harris

What changes when anxiety shows up—and you stop trying to outrun it, and start learning how to work with it?Dan Harris—journalist, bestselling author, and host of 10% Happier—returns to Finding Master...

14 Jan 1h 12min

Why You Should Quit Social Media in 2026 | Cal Newport

Why You Should Quit Social Media in 2026 | Cal Newport

If you’re trying to be productive, what if the answer isn’t to do more… but to do less, better?On today’s episode, we welcome back Cal Newport — Georgetown computer science professor, bestselling auth...

7 Jan 56min

How to Build (and Repair) Love: The Gottmans on What Every Couple Should Know

How to Build (and Repair) Love: The Gottmans on What Every Couple Should Know

The most powerful way to enter a new year is not with resolutions, but with a deeper understanding of how to connect with the people who matter most.As we close out the year, the Finding Mastery team ...

31 Des 20251h

How to Get Unstuck in Life — Lessons on Love from Sharon Salzberg, Meditation Pioneer

How to Get Unstuck in Life — Lessons on Love from Sharon Salzberg, Meditation Pioneer

What if the greatest gift you could offer this season isn’t something you buy—but rather the way you choose to meet yourself and others—with kindness?As we pause new releases over the holidays, the Fi...

24 Des 20251h 2min

This Is Why You’re Tired, Stressed, and Not Healing | Biohacker, Dave Asprey

This Is Why You’re Tired, Stressed, and Not Healing | Biohacker, Dave Asprey

What would change if you stopped trying to push through fatigue — and instead learned what your biology is trying to tell you?On today’s episode of Finding Mastery, we sit down with entrepreneur, auth...

17 Des 20251h 1min

What Microsoft’s Culture Shift Can Teach You in 2026 | Kathleen Hogan

What Microsoft’s Culture Shift Can Teach You in 2026 | Kathleen Hogan

What if the future of work isn’t about technology at all — but about unlocking more humanity in each other?On today’s episode, we sit down with Kathleen Hogan, Chief Strategy and Transformation Office...

10 Des 20251h 7min

The First Openly Gay NBA Player On the Power of Courage, Leadership, and Empathy | John Amaechi

The First Openly Gay NBA Player On the Power of Courage, Leadership, and Empathy | John Amaechi

What does it really mean to live with courage and conviction?On today’s episode, we sit down with Dr. John Amaechi — organizational psychologist, New York Times bestselling author, and the first openl...

3 Des 20251h 21min

How To Live the Good Life - Lessons From The Longest Study On Happiness | Dr. Robert Waldinger

How To Live the Good Life - Lessons From The Longest Study On Happiness | Dr. Robert Waldinger

What if the most powerful thing you can do for your health isn’t diet or exercise — but investing in the people you love?Today’s episode is from the Finding Mastery Vault — a timeless conversation wit...

26 Nov 20251h 6min

Populært innen Fakta

fastlegen
dine-penger-pengeradet
mikkels-paskenotter
relasjonspodden-med-dora-thorhallsdottir-kjersti-idem
foreldreradet
rss-strid-de-norske-borgerkrigene
treningspodden
jakt-og-fiskepodden
rss-bisarr-historie
tomprat-med-gunnar-tjomlid
gravid-uke-for-uke
sinnsyn
level-up-med-anniken-binz
rss-kull
hverdagspsyken
takk-og-lov-med-anine-kierulf
rss-bak-luftfarten
hagespiren-podcast
rss-kunsten-a-leve
fryktlos