S5:E20 - Emma & Franklin - One appointment changed everything

One appointment changed everything

Emma never romanticised motherhood. She spent her whole career caring for other people's children — as a live-in nanny, a live-out nanny, and eventually a kinder assistant — and somewhere along the way she started asking herself whether she'd regret not having a child of her own.

The answer was yes. And that was enough.

She didn't come to this with urgency or grief or a ticking clock. She came to it with clarity. When her best friend's AMH results came back unexpectedly, Emma went and got her own tested. Her level was 8, at 32. She booked an appointment with a fertility specialist — not sure yet whether she'd freeze her eggs or something more — and walked out of that appointment completely certain: she was going to do it now.

She picked a donor in January 2024, on the first day she allowed herself to look. She found him almost immediately. She chose him on vibe — specifically, on the way he answered a question about how he felt about potentially having a biological child out there. His honesty about the nervousness of it was the thing that landed. One round of IVF, first transfer. Positive.

Franklin arrived after an induction and one hour and fifteen minutes of active labour. He was at a wedding five days later. He is now 17 months old, obsessed with his shoes, and recently helped Emma unpack the dishwasher by putting a glass on the shelf at exactly the right height.

This is a short, honest, uncomplicated story. Not every journey is long. Not every IVF cycle fails. Emma's wasn't, and hers is here to remind you that it can just work.

In this episode:

• Growing up always around kids — nannying as a career and how it shaped, and complicated, her path to motherhood

• Why adoption or foster care was always in her thinking — and why the reality in Australia didn't match the idea

• The AMH test that lit the fuse — and the appointment that made the decision for her

• Deciding at 32 that she didn't want to wait for a relationship she wasn't sure was coming

• Choosing a donor almost immediately — and why his answer about nervous anticipation of future contact was the deciding factor

• IVF at City Fertility: smooth, straightforward, first transfer positive

• A quick induction and one hour fifteen minutes of active labour

• Coming home to a full house — her mum, her mum's partner, and a housemate — and how that helped and sometimes didn't

• Mixed feeding until 8 months — three methods running simultaneously because she couldn't choose

• Going to a wedding five days postpartum

• The work complications that caught her off guard — disability job restructured, shifts changed, financially in limbo at 17 months postpartum

• What surprised her most about having a baby after a career caring for other people's children

• The FOMO that disappeared, the priorities that shifted, and the softness that settled in

• Why she wants a second child — and what she'd do differently to prepare

Key Takeaways

• One appointment can make the decision for you — go and get the information before you decide anything

• A low AMH at 32 doesn't mean this is impossible; it means start sooner rather than later

• You don't need a partner to take the next step. You just need to take the next step.

• Working with children professionally does not prepare you emotionally for your own — the connection is completely different

• Don't go back to work assuming everything will be the same — roles change, rosters change, hours change. Have a contingency in mind

• Mixed feeding is not failure. It is just one more decision with pros and cons and no clear winner, and you will get through it either way

• Solo motherhood doesn't have to be hard or long. It can just work.

This episode is brought to you by City Fertility

Exploring fertility treatment as a solo mum in Australia? City Fertility offers an exclusive 20% discount for No Need for Prince Charming listeners. Claim your discount here.

Pregnant solo and looking for your village?

The Bump Membership is a private WhatsApp community and fortnightly Zoom connection calls for solo mums-to-be across Australia and New Zealand. Join here.